Jillian and Gary

I cannot recommend Shannon highly enough in his role. Probably the best comment with regards to Shannon and his role came from my Mum when we were at Mary Potter. “When it’s my time to go, I want you to be my person.”

Gary G, Adelaide

For nearly two years, Jillian had fought her brave battle with terminal brain cancer. In that time, she had never brought up her end of life wishes, or her requirements when it came to funeral arrangements or a memorial service.

She ended up back in hospital, with her oncologists visiting her every day and palliative care specialists coming in for meetings. New scans had confirmed bleeding on the brain and for the first time, a timeline of less than three months had been given by medical staff. I couldn’t wait any longer and brought up the awkward subject; I needed to know what she needed when the time came. Jillian refused to discuss the matter – she simply checked out by playing on her phone or chatting with visitors.

The next day when I turned up at the hospital, Jillian said to me: “You know, you really upset me yesterday when you brought up funeral arrangements. But I have contacted Shannon – you know, Shannon, from musical theatre – who works as an End-of-Life Doula. Shannon said that he would meet us for a chat at home when I get out in a few days. Is that okay?” I said that I had brought up the subject because I needed to know what she wanted when the time came. I told her that I’m glad she had thought about it and contacted Shannon.

Shannon met with us the following week at our place, and during our initial chat, one thing became patently obvious: Shannon could ask all the questions that Jillian didn’t want me to ask. Because of his experience and his calm nature, he put Jillian at ease straight away with the topic and I could feel a huge burden lift from my shoulders. I realised that by employing Shannon, I could simply focus on Jillian’s care. I now had someone in my corner who was going to worry about all the logistical aspects.

Shannon returned the following week with his laptop and formalised all of Jillian’s wishes, both in terms of palliative care and funeral/memorial arrangements. The timing couldn’t have been better, because three days later, Jillian had two seizures and was rushed to emergency. I knew from Jillian’s Advanced Care Directive and Shannon’s meeting exactly what the medical staff could and couldn’t do with Jillian’s care once in the ED.

Her condition stabilised and a few days later, Jillian was transferred to Mary Potter Hospice (as per her wishes). During this time, I was in regular contact with Shannon and he provided tremendous support to our family.

Jillian spent just over two weeks in Mary Potter. Shannon visited regularly, without ever being overly intrusive, checking on Jillian and our family to make sure we had everything we needed. His support became even more crucial towards the end, as I had to undergo surgery for prostate cancer and was unable to be with Jillian. A few days after surgery, I received a phone call from Mary Potter to say that Jillian’s condition had deteriorated. Unable to drive myself to Mary Potter, I contacted Shannon that evening. He went into the hospice to check on her. He got back to me to say that there isn’t long to go and, if you can get into Mary Potter, do it ASAP. My son finished his work shift that night and drove the three of us into the hospice, where we got to speak with Jillian for the last time.

During Jillian’s last day, when she was unresponsive for over 12 hours, Shannon became the conduit between family and the Mary Potter staff. His support and calmness were exemplary, always being on hand with anything we needed.

Shannon took care of the organ donation, cremation and the booking for the memorial service. Again, not having to worry about being solely in charge of these things while grieving and trying to recover from surgery was a massive weight off my shoulders.

Once the date had been set for the memorial service, we formed a small working committee to make sure everything was going to run smoothly, in an effort to give Jillian the best send-off possible. Shannon was leader of this committee and ‘steered the ship’ beautifully. Everything went as well as it possibly could, and all the feedback from my friends was highly positive. Several of them have commented on how good the MC, Bronnie, was on the day. An inspired choice by Shannon.

I cannot recommend Shannon highly enough in his role. Probably the best comment with regards to Shannon and his role came from my Mum when we were at Mary Potter. “When it’s my time to go, I want you to be my person.”

Gary G, Adelaide – May 2025